what does happiness mean exactly? does it mean enjoying your time hangin' out with your friends? Or just being yourself before the world? for me... i'd take the second choice. coz you can't enjoy your time with everyone if you're someone that you're not. i can't be myself when i'm around my family. because i'm never happy when i'm around them. they make me hate myself every second of every minute of every hour of my entire life. they just don't realize it. i've been planning to kill myself for over 3 months now. just can't get the right timing. oh well, my goal is within this month or the next perhaps.. being so unhappy with my life without anyone noticing it makes me feel so blue. just sitting around, watching tv alone the whole day is happy and enjoying to me. i wanna break free!!! be free of everything! like an eagle flying feet above the ground. i hate my life!!!!
every saturday night, my family and i go to church... all i pray is to die one day.... or to get sick causing my death... so it'd be a happily ever after for my family... besides, no one wants me around except for Niko.... 1 is not enough for a person like me... i need more.... i wish i die tomorrow...
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